chemical gdns.

Hi,

I just wanted to write an apology;  I’ve been deleting a lot of my work and posts here and around various other networking sites.  I’ve kind of lost my way a bit, and the way I’ve been viewing my work and myself, alongside this grand world (and universe for that matter) of ours has been swinging a lot like a misbehaving pendulum in recent times.  I create a piece, throw everything in to it, and then end up disliking it all immensely, thus a creative/destructive behaviour emerges.  Often following this, I go through phases of being intensely lazy, throwing up any old shit and then my body of work appears to be clogged up with a lot of weeds that (inevitably) need weeding out.

I know in the grand scheme of things, this has very little consequence and you may even think it is entirely my right to do this which, of course, it is.   This apology is directed mostly at those have taken their time to leave comments and take something from my work.  I may not be arrogant enough to believe my work is going to change the world, but I am quite certain that certain pieces have (even just momentarily) had the potential to touch another person.  It is entirely brash and ridiculous of me to just stomp all over that.  This is why I’m sorry.

Art is, and has always been, a complete joy for me.  The process itself, when running smoothly  is like a sense of  complete clarity and peace I cannot describe.  So, I suppose, the imagery is the description, yet the end result often is at odds with the euphoria of creation itself.

“You have control over action alone, never over its fruits. Live not for the fruits of action, nor attach yourself to inaction.”, David Lynch

So, like many others, I stick a little sail on my work and let it sail out to the masses, and it’s out there with all the other million little boats bobbing in this vast creative sea.  Which boats find their land, and which sink without trace is down to some peculiar algorithm that it is impossible for someone like me to understand.  There are many great, great marketers out there who have a wonderful hit rate with fairly mediocre work, and there are some truly divine visionaries out there who seem largely ignored.  It can seem unfair.  But whoever said it was an easy ride, this life?

Still, before a ramble sets in on us here, I just wanted to explain my behaviour to anyone who has noticed it.  I’m spiritually out of whack, but I know things will be better again soon.  I have a lot to learn, it seems.  But I’m not quite ready to throw myself onto the, ‘has-beens’ and ‘nearly-was’ pile just yet.

Chris

Filed under: digital photography by Chris